Jane Wright writes:
Where do I begin?
Wow the London Marathon! For years I’ve applied only to receive communications with ‘Commiserations’ front and centre. The chance of winning one of two places through the Ealing Eagles ballot seemed remote and I’m thrilled that I got one of them.
This blog is a bit personal but I hope provides a sense of where I’m at and what I’m thinking. Running is a beautiful endeavour both physically and emotionally rewarding. Our running bodies often tell us when things aren’t working properly. Training is a way of taking control in order to develop and improve. For other situations, it’s not that simple. There are some things we can control and some we cannot.
Jumping Right In Marathon Journeys
Last year was an awkward one for me. In 2022, Doctor’s orders forced me not to run three races I’d signed up for including the NYC Marathon. I had one opportunity – defer NYC to 5 November, 2023.
January 2023, I was a month or so into chemotherapy following breast cancer surgery in September ‘22. I felt mostly fine and kept racing as I hadn’t qualified yet for Club Champs. However, new challenges arose. At Met League XC mid-January, I discovered something was very wrong with my lungs (which were honking) as I couldn’t catch any breath properly. I finished but I was an upset mess. Then I got hit with chemotherapy induced peripheral neuropathy severe enough to make me decide to quit chemotherapy three weeks early. My arms, legs, hands and feet felt very weak and strange.
While I got on with training, I continued to beg for answers about my lungs and peripheral neuropathy. I was tested and told that my lungs are damaged, but supposedly not from chemo – strange as my problems started midway through treatment! I was asked if I’d been a heavy smoker. What on earth were they looking at? I have never ever smoked.
My father, whom I looked after for two months in Canada, couldn’t understand why I was running at all. I was in full blown marathon training, necessary if I wanted to get to NYC in any sort of shape. I am proud that I took control of that process completely on my own, running deserted country roads much of the time. My neuropathy improved as did my running, although I was still slow. Occasionally, I entered that wonderful state of flow while running. Pure bliss! Occasionally, the opposite was true.
I returned to the UK with six weeks of training to go and was confronted with a new problem. I was getting pain very similar to sciatica from hip to knees down the backs of both my legs and my hamstrings felt very stiff and sore. In mid-October, three weeks before the NYC Marathon, I saw a physio who diagnosed me with suspected lumbar spinal stenosis. He did some work on me that helped a bit. The following week I asked him, “Should I go to NYC?” He shrugged his shoulders and said as I was fully trained, I could give it a go.
Sadly, the day I flew to New York, I picked up a really nasty bug the one where you have all the symptoms of a bad case of covid but you test negative. I was in bed for three days straight, coughing constantly. My fever broke the day before the Marathon so I hoped I’d be OK. I ran but it was not a pretty sight. Every time I stopped, I started coughing and hacking. My legs felt wooden and I started slowing down, unable to obtain a decent stride.
My State of Mind Then
I’m generally a happy optimist. However, after New York, I was really cross about getting sick, really cross about my ‘crap’ time and particularly cross about missing my ‘good for age’ entry time for London. The only thing left to do would be to apply for the Ealing Eagles London Marathon ballot. So, I did!
I Just Don’t Know (Yet)
I saw a neurologist in mid-November. Thankfully, she’s a runner as is her husband. She understood my distress. She ordered two key tests: a full spinal MRI (results are not yet available) and what I call electrical tests looking at my nerves and how they are functioning.
I understand that there may be things I discover over the course of the next weeks and months that I cannot control. Training can’t hurt me but I will need to listen to the experts. I should add that I am well supported by my family, good friends and many Ealing Eagles.
The physio at my GP service is a little nervous about all of this. She told me not to do yoga (although Pilates would be ok) and not to run (walking was suggested.) I did start walking parkrun but the first parkrun when it rained heavily, I was motivated to run, not walk! I felt pretty good actually.
Good Start!
It’s fun to have an official marathon plan begin on the 1st of January. I ran Ally Pally parkrun (letter A) with Jenny Baker and James De Vivenot. My running plan is basically 3 to 4 runs a week, concentrating on building the long runs. I practice yoga plus do weight training. I’m going to try and move my long runs to mid-week so that I can cycle on the weekends. That will make me happy!
Going Forward with Optimism
My legs often feel stiff and non-responsive. The nerve pain and extremely tight hamstrings can be just awful. I only have short experiences (usually mid-run) with easy-ish running. That’s when I feel good. However, I seem to have to work hard almost all of the time. Running used to be easy. I have not yet experienced flow in my training but I remain hopeful. Caroline Rush massages and my theragun will help I’m sure!
I will get definitive news from my medical team soon. I’m praying that the practitioners involved will fully sanction my marathon efforts. Fingers crossed! If I don’t get good news and have to drop out, I will be happy to pass my place to the lovely and talented Anna Shierson. There are deadlines for this. Watch this space.
In either case, this may prove to be a long and challenging road. I’m glad you, dear readers, are coming along for the ride.